Monday, June 14, 2010

lost on everyone present at that moment

Late Saturday afternoon, my husband returned from a week away at camp. After he showered and dressed and smelled Not Like Campfire, we promptly went on a date.

We got a table at one of my favorite restaurants, enjoying conversation, catching up on each others' week. We shared an appetizer, a salad, and a pizza. While enjoying my second slice, I bit down on something. It was hard. And tiny. And not cheese or a mushroom, which are the only things we ordered to be on the pizza. My tongue tried to investigate: a peppercorn? No, not peppery taste. A seed? No, I didn't break it with my teeth. I decided to daintily remove it from my mouth. What the . . .?

A screw.

A tiny, metal screw.

I showed it to Darin, and then called over the host. "Hi, I have something to show you." When he arrived at our tableside I opened my hand to reveal the screw in my left palm. "This was in my pizza."

His jaw dropped, and he took the screw from me. "Oh my, a screw," he whispered.

"Yes. In my pizza."

A thoughtful look on his face, he said, "The weird thing is, I think I know exactly where this came from."

"Really?" I asked. "Well, I hope the building doesn't fall down."

"I don't think it will," he said, while walking away. "I'll take that pizza off your bill."

"Thank you," I called.

After sharing our dessert and paying our bill, Darin and I stood up to leave. As we were walking out the door, the host called out to us, "Good-bye! Sorry again about the screw."

As soon as he said it, my mind accessed a file of a quote I didn't think I'd ever, EVER be able to use in an actual conversation.

"Hey, what can you do? Screws fall out all the time. The world's an imperfect place."


Annette Lyon said...

The fact that the server didn't get it simply means we're ANCIENT. (Feel better? :D)

Also: Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?

The Lewis Family said...

Um, maybe it came from the kitchen? What a dumb response. I don't know where it came from??? Like you expected an answer. Ha, no, you expected an apology and free pizza. Dude, I would have pushed for free everything ;)


Tenille said...

I hate when that happens. granted, I usually quote Friends, but it's always lousy when I have to explain it...

the Lola Letters said...

Oh wow!

I think it's fairly awesome that the host called out "Sorry again about the screw."

I think that would be my most favorite thing to have ever had called out to me in a public place before.


wendysue said...

Oh, Bender. Seriously, when are we planning our 48 hour straight movie watching marathon?