tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post8195535476966383248..comments2023-07-27T09:43:37.478-06:00Comments on formerly phread: hospitable~j.http://www.blogger.com/profile/02959570365515658547noreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-38463706022420486492010-02-21T15:56:27.873-07:002010-02-21T15:56:27.873-07:00Thank you! That is all I can say. If you don'...Thank you! That is all I can say. If you don't have anything nice to say...keep it to yourself. I value your wisdom.Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08944088956278891140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-42947356496011898232010-02-21T15:20:12.465-07:002010-02-21T15:20:12.465-07:00I'm assuming that you got to go to Sue's b...I'm assuming that you got to go to Sue's blogarama? Lucky dog. I don't know whether the story about the friend was a parable or a real deal - I think people are far less likely to follow you into your physical house, stand eye to eye with you and deconstruct your life than they are to help themselves to your internet presence, and then, with the protection of mostly-anonymity - unleash the uncivil part of themselves in your face.<br /><br />I've never understood this proclivity to ravage other people from a safe distance. The funny thing about the behavior is that, in being uncivil, the attacker is likely to expose him or herself as pretty much a big idiot - usually the way they use language is skill-less and really without effective impact. <br /><br />When we write civilly, we can still disagree with quiet force - and sometimes it's a thousand times more effective to use the language in a civilized and obviously intelligent and measured manner while you're disagreeing.<br /><br />I'm not sure about the walking away thing, though. Sometimes people really do say dangerous things in their blogs - and if the blog is public, I think an intelligent and responsible reader has to speak up - not just to defend a measurable truth, but to offer a differing point of view. But the deal is, you don't have to be rude and stupid to disagree - and really, who's going to listen to you if you are that way? But the point is, if you can counteract poison with kind and measured reason - you really should.<br /><br />I'm repeating myself here, I guess. Here's another blog rule I'm making up right now: BLOGGERS ARE ALLOWED TO DELETE COMMENTS. Any time you like. You can call the police and have a nasty neighbor removed from your living room, but all you have to do is hit delete when the nastiness shows up in your net territory. Do it and feel no guilt.<br /><br />And now I' think about it, I've actually had that neighbor thing happen to me. I'd forgotten about it. Whew. I avoided that person forever after that till she moved her brassy little self from the neighborhood. We had a parade -Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02040714440875408436noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-81154198306191612612010-02-20T18:08:52.531-07:002010-02-20T18:08:52.531-07:00Jenny, it was so great to meet you today.
And, in...Jenny, it was so great to meet you today.<br /><br />And, in fact, after the brunch, I attended a baby shower, and Kalli was talking to me and Motherboard about this post.<br /><br />There has been some negativity in blog world lately that I have encountered, and I just don't get it. At all. My favorite commenter in the whole world is Anonymous. <br /><br />If you have to hide behind that shield, you know you wouldn't actually say that to that person.<br /><br />You are going on my Reader, my friend!Kristina P.https://www.blogger.com/profile/16144488639100871226noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-22452006242894716652010-02-20T15:11:14.184-07:002010-02-20T15:11:14.184-07:00Oh my gosh, that story about your friend is insane...Oh my gosh, that story about your friend is insane!! I can't imagine something like that happening. I agree with you, just walk away. Take Facebook, for example. Is there really a need for a "dislike" button? If you don't like something, no need to comment!Evelynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16715568390101432378noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-58531757285583096482010-02-20T14:08:18.880-07:002010-02-20T14:08:18.880-07:00BUT WHAT IF YOU CAN'T LOOK AWAY?!?!?BUT WHAT IF YOU CAN'T LOOK AWAY?!?!?Jules AFhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05380372212489758689noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-11942448551192314882010-02-19T20:27:59.296-07:002010-02-19T20:27:59.296-07:00You make such a great point. I have walked away m...You make such a great point. I have walked away many times from blogs, people and things that offend me. It is easier that way and then no one gets hurt. I am so sorry about your friend. I can't believe that someone would have the nerve to do that.Shellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17707913022405563391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-91338552240927190222010-02-19T09:16:27.866-07:002010-02-19T09:16:27.866-07:00everytime i write something remotely controversial...everytime i write something remotely controversial, a bunch of people unsubscribe from my blog.<br /><br />i don't like anthropologie/ UNSUBSCRIBE. <br /><br />it's funny, but really and truly, i appreciate that people are mature enough to just walk away. unsubscribe and walk away.<br /><br />please bless the internet not to have trolls, amen.Stephhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02231178030238211520noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-20538031403838181802010-02-18T12:55:19.964-07:002010-02-18T12:55:19.964-07:00I love that you wrote this! So important. I espe...I love that you wrote this! So important. I especially loved your "just walk away" advice for if something irritates you on a blog. It seems like many people feel it is their personal responsibility to right every wrong they come in contact with. Much more is accomplished with being nice than being cruel.Quinnhttp://theartisticmom.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-51225984089665079912010-02-18T12:52:36.874-07:002010-02-18T12:52:36.874-07:00Woah....can't believe someone would come into ...Woah....can't believe someone would come into someone elses home and act that way. <br /><br />The world is filled with many kinds of people though.<br /><br />Great post!<br /><br />I have said it many times. If you don't like something there is always that white x at the top of every screen. My Trendy Tykeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05670932450797484248noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-69015555741925447302010-02-18T12:47:01.793-07:002010-02-18T12:47:01.793-07:00Oh I loved that you wrote this.
I like Sue read t...Oh I loved that you wrote this.<br /><br />I like Sue read that blog and was SEETHING SEETHING all night long! I did write a comment and wish I had not, that would have been a good time to ---walk away--- I haven't been back since to the blog and won't ever will. But I wish I hadn't of even left a comment.<br /><br />So many people write such nasty things and do such horrible backtalking behind the computer screen. I know they wouldn't act like this "IRL" its sad that they do behind the screen :(<br /><br />Thanks for posting this!vanessahttp://www.inevergrewup.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-48713569142160810652010-02-18T09:27:46.657-07:002010-02-18T09:27:46.657-07:00"there are times when knowing someone on a mo..."there are times when knowing someone on a more superficial level is the right path". <br /><br />I'm glad you said that.<br /><br />And Amen.sue-donymhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05157709722120704944noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-70209789331194596332010-02-17T21:49:15.821-07:002010-02-17T21:49:15.821-07:00First of all, I can't believe someone would do...First of all, I can't believe someone would do that to your friend. <br /><br />Second of all, I agree with you.<br /><br />Third of all, I make sure that everything I say online is something I would say to somebody's face. <br /><br />And sometimes, I say things that aren't sugar-coated. But I keep it civil. Except one time I accidentally made one of my critical comments anonymous. And the fact that it was anonymous was the embarrassing part, not the critical comment.Jill Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02921435124268500344noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-33976985736076202472010-02-17T21:11:34.852-07:002010-02-17T21:11:34.852-07:00I got on here intending to just say amen and amen....I got on here intending to just say amen and amen. <br /><br />And then scrolled through the comments only to see that other people obviously thought the same thing.<br /><br />And I feel bad for your friend who invited that lady in her house. That had to sting. I'm just wondering how I would respond if something like that happened to me.Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13470683692371535117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-58193576313243099172010-02-17T19:44:36.643-07:002010-02-17T19:44:36.643-07:00this needs to be shouted (nicely) from every rooft...this needs to be shouted (nicely) from every rooftop. Thank you for this post. I've recently had the mean person experience both by blog and coming to my door, and it was (without meaning to sound too dramatic) crippling, for a time. Gradually, I remembered all the truly wonderful people I am surrounded by daily, in Bloggerland and where I really live, who cheer for me and stand by me. I will still be nice.Kristahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03734014895825429358noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-7446806948814528872010-02-17T19:33:00.685-07:002010-02-17T19:33:00.685-07:00I recently had to take down my blog due to some ra...I recently had to take down my blog due to some ranting and very, very rude and unnecessary comments. I always practice the tried and true advice of Thumper. You know, "If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all." Seems simple enough to me!Rhondahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11401395669498079057noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-79536348400629497342010-02-17T19:25:12.796-07:002010-02-17T19:25:12.796-07:00I'm guilty of bad behavior online, and I will ...I'm guilty of bad behavior online, and I will say it never makes me feel better--about myself or about anything. <br /><br />There's nothing to gain from purposed cruelty, whereas kindness breeds friendship and growth.Bebe McGoochhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14498273486476170108noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-35549699104651630402010-02-17T18:57:38.427-07:002010-02-17T18:57:38.427-07:00Excellent post. I really think that mean people su...Excellent post. I really think that mean people suck. And that if you can't say something nice, you shouldn't say anything at all.Nicolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09741556399764341585noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-74603782829508727522010-02-17T18:40:50.890-07:002010-02-17T18:40:50.890-07:00amen.
i had someone in a trusted position (essent...amen.<br /><br />i had someone in a trusted position (essentially someone who was "called" to be my friend) do that to me once. only he or she didn't bother with the house and got straight to business ripping on me.<br /><br />it hurt.<br /><br />big time.<br /><br />anyway, well said. i try to be nice, but i probably could be nicer (i mean i really could be nicer) when i comment after someone has ripped on one of my friends. i get all mother bear about that. but ima gonna work on it.compulsive writerhttp://compulsivewriter.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-71546118126380924002010-02-17T17:13:05.220-07:002010-02-17T17:13:05.220-07:00That really happened? Holy cow!
I totally agree. ...That really happened? Holy cow!<br /><br />I totally agree. That's why I don't understand it when bloggers get hate email... what is wrong with people?<br /><br />Ditto on FB too... if you're just going to be a total wanker...walk away. ;-)QueenScarletthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02270993732115125040noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-80165380319217251082010-02-17T16:22:26.760-07:002010-02-17T16:22:26.760-07:00Muy bien, j, muy bien. How I loved reading the ex...Muy bien, j, muy bien. How I loved reading the exchange to which you linked! :) THANK YOU!<br /><br />I'm not at all surprised at the experiences mentioned here. I see far too much unfriendly banter in real life and it has just spilled over into the tech world. I think it's a universal problem.Christihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08025068909855339449noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-78228137970981718202010-02-17T15:24:46.785-07:002010-02-17T15:24:46.785-07:00What I didn't comment on this yet? I'm lo...What I didn't comment on this yet? I'm losing my brain. <br /><br />This is what blows me away the most about blogging. Yes, public forum, yes, freedom of speech, blah blah blah. All that aside, when did the convenience of "anonymous" or even the ballsy ones who leave their name and link make people into complete trolls??<br /><br />La Yen said it best, haters to the left.Kallihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12918042036874607310noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-11893215533121498172010-02-17T14:48:39.406-07:002010-02-17T14:48:39.406-07:00Wow.
At first I thought you were going to say Jes...Wow. <br />At first I thought you were going to say Jesus was the visitor, but then I'm all like, Ohhh, that's not Jesus, that's Satan visiting. <br />I hope she gave him a boot to the head when he left. <br />Or at least to his arse. <br />Of all the nerve.Carrot Jellohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17627476718171567049noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-40756865360759951252010-02-17T14:33:20.542-07:002010-02-17T14:33:20.542-07:00I don't know if it's because I'm chick...I don't know if it's because I'm chicken or nice but I can't think of a negative comment I've left in response to a post. Like you said, unless you're correcting misinformation or clarifying something, it doesn't help anyone to leave something negative or nasty. <br /><br />I tend to use that whole "walk away" thing in life as well. I don't send that email, I don't make that phone call...instead it all goes down in a journal (or it previously was written in a journal--that seemed to have ended with kids). I can vent there, turn the page and move on.<br /><br />I simply must tweet this post--it's perfect and timely!Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12394453668517249660noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-33293990458475069442010-02-17T14:25:37.889-07:002010-02-17T14:25:37.889-07:00Amen. I'm still surprised how rude people can...Amen. I'm still surprised how rude people can be when leaving comments, like you say, stop reading if you don't like it!Naomihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00089261017280498455noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13871850.post-21697172642065207202010-02-17T13:12:30.505-07:002010-02-17T13:12:30.505-07:00Why on earth did that lady attack your friend? Th...Why on earth did that lady attack your friend? That's outrageous! Seriously, some people think the whole world needs to hear their every thinking thought.Lucreciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12432696356191781540noreply@blogger.com