Friday, July 23, 2010

and the doctor said

"There I was, at my doctor's office, again. How many times did we have to have this conversation? My weight would NOT drop. Strict calorie-counting of a smartly-portioned diet and exercise -- I was doing it the old-fashioned way WITHOUT any success. Strong legs, yes, but a waist size so large -- a belly, a gut. I was shaped like an ice cream cone. I was a triathlete, and people were asking me when I was due.

My doctor, chart in hand, looked at me over his glasses. 'I think it's time to take the next step. We need to reduce the size of your abdomen. I'd like for you to consider an abdominoplasty. I can give you a referral for a surgeon, and because this affects your health, your insurance should cover at least a portion.'

With the promise of a referral from my doctor and a paper with three surgeons' names written on a slip of paper tucked into my purse, I left my doctor's office and planned for the surgery.


**********************

That's not how it happened.

But sometimes I think that that's how I should begin my story, because people have a weird thing about it, about abdominoplasty, or more commonly, a tummy tuck - an elective procedure, but they have absolutely no problem with any procedure if a doctor suggests it. I've been judged by adults in ways I wouldn't have thought possible. I've also gotten more support than I expected.

I think it's time I wrote out my story here.

Monday I'll continue.

24 comments:

cw said...

I applaud you for telling your story--brave woman, you.

My hope has always been that if more of us told our stories--and more of us really listened to the stories of the women around us--we'd stop judging and do a heck of a lot more loving.

xo

alexis said...

i'm all about sharing and oversharing. can't wait to hear about it, i have several girlfriends who would be interested to know. if you've also gotten a boob job, i might be interested in that.

Kacy said...

I judge you. And my judgment is that you are awesome.

AzĂșcar said...

You are braveawesome (new word.)

Amy said...

Congrats that is so awesome. I've had friends who have had a tummy tuck and they would do it again.

No judgement here, just support. (and maybe a little jealousy).:)

~j. said...

cw - Yes, I agree. Really listened. thank you.

alexis - I haven't, but I know people who have.

Kacy - Judger.

Azu'car - Thank you.

~j. said...

Amy - thank you! (And, though I'll likely mention this later, I'd do it again, too.)

Emily said...

Can't wait to hear your story. I subscribe to the belief that you do whatever works for you. No judging here. More like "you go, girl!"

Fig said...

Oooh, I'm excited for the story! Also, good for you.

Heather said...

I think it's awesome and can't wait to read the story! My friend just recently did this after deciding she was done having children. She is much for confident and is super happy she did it. Good for you Jenny!

Ashlee @ I'm Topsy Turvy said...

Can't wait to hear about it. People amazing me daily with their closed minds and judgement. Line me up. Once my husband has a job again and we're for SURE done having kids I am totally getting a breast reduction/lift!

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I can't wait to learn about it because frankly that frightens me. I'm in that same predicament. I exercise and eat right and to no avail. I wish we would have talked about it in person.

Thanks for sharing girl!

Lindsey Johnson said...

Pictures? :)

I'm a reformed judger. The more I think about it...well, the more I wouldn't mind having a lift upstairs and a little (or BIG) tuck in the middle. Also, I'm all for getting my leg veins fixed.

Just thought everyone would want to know that.

Kalli Ko said...

I like this story, but I almost missed it bc of the partial feed. WHINE WHINE WHINE

Mrs. Organic said...

I never know what to say, but I think sharing your story strengthens you.

I wish people would get down off their judgey soapboxes. It makes it hard for the rest of us (and here I must confess I used to have my own soapbox that I was fond of getting on).

b. said...

I'm glad you're telling it...it needs to be told.

Aubrey said...

Ha Ha...that is why I live my life the way I do. We fall short in so many areas that people have lowered the bar for us. Seriously...lower expectations aren't always bad.

After 7 and 6 pound twins that caused a hernia and my big 9 lb 7 oz baby I am going to do it as soon as we can afford it. And a breast lift. I feel no guilt. I am just working on the weight. But if I can't lose it on my own, I will do a bypass also.

Two close friends have done it and it has changed their lives.

My friend Erica now hikes mountains for fun!

CKW said...

Why are braces accepted, but not nose jobs? I'm in full favor of elective surgery procedure whether to fix something you have consistently hated or just want to look the way you did before kids (because 98% of us are not lucky enough to 'bounce back')

Kemp Kuties said...

Nothing wrong with surgery, especially since you've dedicated yourself to making lifestyle changes first. And, just so you know in advance...I will be jealous of you and envious of you :)

~j. said...

Emily, Fig, Heather, Ashlee - thank you!

Shelle - we'll talk about it next time we see each other.

Lindsey - pictures? I have them, but...you'd puke.

Kalli - I hope your prenatal vitamins give you the energy you need for that extra click.

~j. said...

Mrs. Organic - As did I. We all did, and do, and hopefully hearing others' story will cause some stepping down, you know?

b. - thank you, Friend.

Aubrey - Awesome. And good for your friends. It really has made such a huge difference.

CKW - I like your braces analogy. Yes.

KK - No need for jealousy, Friend. You always look great.

sue-donym said...

And all this time I thought you just drew a big smiley face on your tummy.



I'm glad you're telling your story.

Lindsey Johnson said...

Not THOSE kind of pictures! Actually, I think I saw you from a distance at the Farmer's Market a few weeks ago. If I hadn't been chasing my crazy kids, I'd have come over to see if it was you.

~j. said...

sue - Uh, I did do that. Silly.

Lindsey - I've only been at the market once this summer, but it was a few weeks ago. Wasn't it great?!