Thursday, June 01, 2006

boy oh boy oh boy

My oldest daughter, who is seven, has pretty much been a tomboy up to this point. She still doesn't get into the doll scene as much as other girls. Don't get me wrong, she likes glitter and a spinny dress as much as the next chica, she just...isn't as into it as, say, my other daughters, particularly the one who is four. That daughter loves to watch me put on make-up, and play with my jewelry and brush her hair and the like. Li'l ~j. ...not so much. She's in a hurry to get outside and play basketball or ride bikes.

We had a few incidents a while ago with li'l ~j. not being completely honest (well, more like blatantly lying just because), and it came out that she doesn't want us to be mad. So we've done our best to make it clear that as long as she tells us the truth, everything else can be worked out.

Let me just tell you.

She tells me the truth all right. About everything. Every thought, every action, every thought that was almost an action ("I feel like I stole Skittles from Miss Morgan, but I didn't!"). She incessantly confesses everything and although it can be draining, at times, for me to listen to it, I feel that we're establishing a good habit, so we keep it up.

Lately, the confessions have been about boys. Who she's got a crush on (which, I have to admit, is easier for me to hear than that she 'loves' some boy), who else has a crush on who else, etc.. She starts the crush talk with the following:

"Mom, I have to tell you a secret, okay, and promise, PROMISE you won't tell anyone, just keep this between the two of us, okay?"

Every time. That's how she starts it every time.

I think my favorite description is this:

"Sometimes I feel like I have a crush on Hunter, but I don't!"

I like that description because I remember feeling that way, and li'l ~j.'s the one who was able to put it into words. When she's with a boy that she can be friends with, she gets an imitation of a crush, but upon further reflection, she knows that it's not actually a crush. I have a hard time explaining it even now.

We've been taking swimming lessons each morning this week (I say "we" because while li'l ~j. & Curly are in their classes, Superstar & I take a parent/toddler class as well) and just yesterday li'l ~j. told me that there's a boy in her class that she's got a crush on. She doesn't know his name. They've never spoken to each other.

Ahh, seven year olds.

Today, after lessons, li'l ~j. said to me, "Mom, you know that boy that...you know? Well, today he talked to me."

"Really? What did he say?"

"When he stands the water goes to here (points to her forehead) on him. He told me that. And about swimming fast."

She still doesn't know his name.

I'm glad lessons will end next week. But she'll find another, I'm sure.

15 comments:

compulsive writer said...

Seven, huh? Just you wait. My fifth-grader daughter came home from the last day of school so blue because she did the math and realized she wouldn't see her sixth-grader crush for over a year.

I remember the Mom & Tots classes at the pool--sooooo much fun. How cool!

Enjoy!

wendysue said...

I saw evidence of the 7 year old crushes at last weeks "School skate night". . .Ah yes, the boys chasing around my daughter as they squeeze her arms and try to tackle her. . .all the while as she giggles and giggles. I think I'm sick to my stomach. Please let her just stay 7.

AzĂșcar said...

I feel like I should watch The Breakfast Club but I haven't.

I feel like I went to sleep at a reasonable hour, but I didn't!

nie nie said...

i miss those cute Eckton girls

Julie said...

Did the swimmer boy have really tiny feet? Cause boys are cute only if they have really small feet.

~j. said...

compulsive & wendy - Will the two of you be my mentors? Perhaps we can start some sort of support group?

shuge - I feel like I should eat more popcorn at night but I shouldn't.

nie - this Eckton girl misses you and your girls!

julie - touche (with a ` over the 'e'. I don't know how to do that.).

Queen Scarlett said...

I love that she shares so much with you. And... as the one kid in my family that did... share everything - like how yummy kissing was when I started dating... yeah - they let me spill it all without judgement - just baffled and amused smiles. She will so appreciate it. I love the feeling that I never had to hide anything and that I was always accepted.

LuckyRedHen said...

My 2yr old (today she's 3) had a major crush on "Josh" who was her brothers swimming instructor. She'd babble (because in those days we didn't understand her words) in a normal tone but when she'd say "Josh" she'd get all mushy and her voice would change. Don't blame her though, I think we all had a crush on "Josh."

Bek said...

Jen...this is so cute.

I haven't been able to comment on your blog for awhile ... my computer sucks...

That is such a cute story, but scary too. 7...huh...I think it is starting in my house early. The scary part is that because Rae is such a "tomboy" she will know all the boys really well and then one day they will notice her (and be impressed b/c she is so cute AND can kick their bum's at sports) and then it will really begin...

LuckyRedHen said...

BTW: my blog page has changed to...

http://luckyredhen.blogspot.com/

Please make a note of it (especially on your link section).

Thanks and I hope you MITE have a nice Sunday ;o)

Gina said...

What a great relationship you have with her. I love that she has nothing hindering her honesty. What a joy she must be.

Tori :) said...

Yeah, Isabel is continually asking me who I think she'll marry. She thinks it has to be someone she's met so far in life. I really hope not...

Lorien said...

oh boy.

glad to read this post.

~j. said...

Queen - I love hearing about the relationship you have with your parents. Thanks for sharing your experiences.

bek - isn't THAT a weird stage?! After the girls have had their crushes for awhile and the boys finally catch on! By the way, I LOVE your fish story(ies).

imsew - done and done. You are now "sew funny...sew lucky".

gina - welcome! And thank you. She is a joy. ...I noticed you said elsewhere that you're going to Indiana soon?? I am too, next week. Are you from there?

tori - Isn't that funny? Their future husband has to be someone they know now? No thanks.

lorien - glad you liked it. How was your trip? Are you home now?

Geo said...

Great post. Gee, what will you do if Rae one day starts talking to you about yummy kissing? I can't even imagine that. The telling part, I mean--not the yummy kissing part.